If I’m Being Honest |Adulting is Hard

Then I would say a lot of things that would make you think differently.

Because honestly I have no clue what I am doing in my life. And honestly I almost quit 7 times today. And I want to find some sort of happiness in the day and wine seems like it would do that. I want to go to sleep and have a dance party at the same time. I want to buy all of the things that I have seen lately because society tells me that it brings joy.

But honestly I am just writing a blog, doing laundry and watching my phone blow up about things I don’t care to read. Honestly I won’t drink a sip of wine because I know it doesn’t solve shit. Honestly I am blasting some weird song that has an appreciative amount of bass while contemplating eating nutella for dinner.

And honestly I have succulents and cereal in my trunk, a sock on my table and not a care in the world.

If I am being honest then I have grown so so much. I asked Mom/ Ass Kicker if I could dye my hair black and get my nose pierced. She said no… But I think I would. And maybe get a tattoo. Buy tarot cards, more crystals and a magic 8 ball because it brings me joy.

The journey of finding yourself is really weird when you start to change all over again. Everyday I want to be at the beach and blast music, everyday I want to paint or run 52 miles. I just W A N T so much- and not a person or any particular thing- but experience.

I want to go travel some more this year. I have no upcoming trips planned and I think I need to change that.

Today at work I got so frustrated with a huge project (magically due today) that one of the Program Directors made me tea (she’s British and tea fixes everything). She said if this is you frustrated I would have never known- you’re still calm, quiet and chipper. And it kind of brought me back to reality. No matter what I “feel” has changed about me, it doesn’t change the ME inside. I am still kind, caring and strangely obsessed with English Breakfast tea.

And honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

 

Shit Vegas Friend Does

Soooo. I basically have the best friends ever. First there’s Mom/Ass Kicker letting me use her house as an Amazon package post office and supplying me with animal crackers and macaroni. Then there’s B who has bought me so much stuff for my “apartment”, down to deodorant and conditioner. And then we have Vegas Friend. Who comes to help me all the time with literally everything. 

He offered me his truck to help move my stuff. 

He supplies me with pepper spray. 

Buys my favorite pop tarts and always ensures there’s coffee creamer at his house for me. Ps- he doesn’t drink coffee. 

I mention a good wine once and he tries to buy 6 of them- he doesn’t drink alcohol either. 

He’s always there for late night “what am I doing with my life” phone calls. 

He listens to work drama. 

He reads all my blogs and always checks to see how the Vegas Friend ones preform. He likes to think Adultish is growing because of him. Lol. Which is notably true according to my stats. 

And then he does some crazy shit like spend his last few hours before having to go to bed to work 12 hours straight to put my bed frame up. 

Oh wait- forgot something. 

 He let’s me crash at his house and vomit when I leave work from a migraine. 

Adultish’s Crash Course in Budgeting- Dave Ramsey Style

This blog is brought to you in part by divorce, learning to survive your twenties and the inevitable mental breakdown.

I “grew up” really fast. I would say my childhood was completed by the time of 8, and then it was all about responsibility. I always had a really good cushion in life though when it came to my living situation. When I moved out I went to live with my aunt and uncle, rent free. Then I moved in with my then-boyfriend-now-ex-husband, rent free. But when I got divorced it was a whole new world of rent, car insurance, and meals for one. WHAT IS LIFE. Who knows, but these are my tips along the way.

Budget, budget, and budget again. I know a lot of concern comes from when we feel the budget we just implemented doesn’t work after a few weeks- that’s because a budget should be ever evolving. The moment there is a $5 discrepancy, or you had an emergency expense come up- it’s time for a new budget.

Along with budgeting is automatic bill pay. Be it scheduling a check to go out a few days prior to when rent is due, or signing up for automatic payment with Sprint for your phone bill.

Don’t utilize all of your available credit. For instance, if you have a credit card and the limit is $500 a month, do not put $500 on it even if you’re paying it off. Your credit score is based on the amount of credit you’re using paired with the amount of remaining credit. If you utilize all of your available credit you are “maxing out”, even if you pay off or not.

Shop around. Amazon is really tempting but the dollar store and Walmart are usually cheaper- and no need to wait for it to ship.

Also with Amazon, use your shopping cart for thinking. If you REALLY want a new car stereo- add it in your cart and let it be. One of three things will happen. One- you will decide against it. Two- it will go on sale and you will buy it. Three- you will buy it after waiting and know your decision was justified. 2/3 involve saving money.

Your health is really important. I am really NOT  the most reliable source for healthy eating as my diet is mainly coffee and leftovers- but small simple changes make a huge impact. Drink all the coffee you want- but flush it out with water. Eat (at least) three meals a day. Make at least one high in protein, one high in veggies/ vitamins/ minerals, and another just make it delicious! Meal prep and save your life. (nobutseriously) know what you like, buy it and make it. You won’t go out to eat as much, and you’ll actually eat!

Challenge yourself to 30 days of no spending. This is easiest at the beginning of a month. Pay your rent, insurance, gas- all the necessities. Buy groceries that you NEED to make the meals you will EAT. And *do not spend another penny* this is when the amazon cart trick is helpful, same with meal planning.

Look up anything and everything by Dave Ramsey. Figure out how to debt snowball- GET OUT OF DEBT. This has got to be the biggest thing ever. Once you pay off your debts you will have so much additional money left over each month- it’s almost like a second job.

Build your savings. Start with saving $1,000 and DO NOT TOUCH IT. This comes in handy when you do have automatic bill pay but not enough money in your checking’s. (Sidenote: make sure you bank doesn’t penalize you if they have to take out of your savings)

 

Finally- realize that all of these things combined help you reach your end goal in life- financial freedom… oh, and being an adult/ having your shit together.

GYST DAY

I’ve spoken before about GYST days and how I value them. Sundays are my coveted days for Gyst-ing I like to get as much done as possible so that I can try and relax during the week (or, if you’re keeping up with my life; in case I get a deadly head cold and sleep for 48 hours).

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A made bed is now a rule for me, because if I don’t make my bed I tend to crawl back into it for “just 5 more minutes”. Most Sundays I have to calculate my priorities, cleaning/ chores or homework. This Sunday I did my chores first because I was totally  putting off homework. #Whoops

I deeply needed to organize all of my files, bills, letters, divorce crap- so I got out my trusty label maker and labeled a file folder/pendaflex thing and got to work. I really didn’t like the idea of all my bills and important documents being in a million places, so organizing them like this was awesome! Now if I need anything I know exactly where it is, and it takes a second to grab. And of course in the event of a fire/ tsunami/ SoCal-Natural-Disaster we might have, I will be prepared! IMG_4915

Around 10 I practically forced myself to sit down and get some homework done. I wouldn’t say that my classes are hard (excluding one that I am in right now where i’m 98% sure my professor is trying to kill me). However, it takes such self discipline to sit down for hours and devote your time to homework. Nevertheless I do it- even if I seriously don’t want to.

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At some point in the day I dusted the house, did some laundry, cleaned my bathroom… and then the fun part of GYST day…

PEDICURE TIME! IMG_4989

Now of course this is not an every week thing for two reasons. 1- I hate people touching my feet and it took an unbelievable amount of will power not to kick this lady in the face. So ticklish it’s agony. (But I have cute toes now!) And 2- I am not rich by ANY means, and this is definitely an unnecessary expense.

All in all this was a pretty typical/ normal GYST day for me. Sometimes I do more, sometimes less- but the point of GYST-ing is to literally Get Your Shit Together. Homework and cleaning are always a priority, as is some sort of hair mask (I saved you guys from the picture, you are welcome), and on occasion I shave my legs.

Only occasionally- winter is coming. 🙂

#HandleIt

One of the most profound things I have learned in life is that you just have to to #handleit.

Is the sink over flowing with dishes and are you out of clean underwear? Handle it.

Homework due in 45 minutes, you just burnt your dinner and your hair has reached the limit of dry shampoo intake…. #handleit. impossoble things

There are so many things that I don’t want to do. For instance, I don’t want to call the lawyer about my divorce on my lunch break; but I have to. I don’t want to come home and do homework when I am dead-dog-exhausted; but I have to. I don’t want to look at my bank account, or set up an automatic savings plan, devote an entire day to laundry and meal prep; but I have to.

Being adult-ish means we have to do stuff we don’t like. We have to put our big girl (or boy, no judging) panties on and get shit done!

Because if not we would all be naked on the couch eating cheeto puffs and bon bons…

 

Let that sink in…

cheeto puff