Happy Magnifying Divorce Day

I know, I know, so dramatic… But wowza watching the flowers pour in at work even the day before Valentine’s day got me all emotional… and pissed. And for reasons that I can’t even say I understand- yet here we are, emotional and pissed. Now the weirdest part of this is that it’s not like my husband really did a lot for me when it came to Valentine’s day, or even my birthday for that matter. So I shouldn’t be upset at all, it should really just be another day, another year of not getting something. BUT it just seems like everything is magnified and emotions are high and I just want to walk around with two middle fingers up all day. Too bad that’s not even in the realm of “Professional Behavior”.

 

Then people who I do tell about how I feel just say that Valentine’s Day just say that it’s “a made up holiday anyway, just don’t think about it”. But it’s not Valentine’s Day I hate, it’s just the reminder that at some point I was in love, and said vows promising to love someone till death do us part- or really until my husband just decided he wanted a divorce and BOOM, marriage over. OY!

 

But I will just swim in all the Celine Dion songs ever made, eat my own chocolate and wear pink anyway.

 

Oh, but F-U Valentines Day. J

Vegas Friend | Tell All… (TMI)

 

We’ve known each other for years. We went on a “date” (really unsure if it should be called a date, complicated) the night I signed my divorce papers. Now- this was *not* a date. I am not like a total crazy person here who decided 4 minutes after getting a divorce that “I wanted to start dating”. We simply went to dinner.

We spent a lot of time together at first. We would get off work at about the same time, usually make some sort of dinner plans, and sometimes I would stay the night. Now this was also before the time that I drove, so Vegas Friend would pick me up and drop me off all the time.

Dinner, movies, get a massage, go to Vegas, stay in and watch Tosh.0- even weird mundane shit like grocery shopping- I didn’t drive and we both needed to go.

I needed to buy a car so I saved what I thought would be enough for a down payment. Vegas friend and I woke up one morning and he said “wanna go car shopping today?”. And no, I did not. At all. I thought I was going to DIE from anxiety. I wouldn’t even test drive any of the vehicles because I was too scared. I ended up finding my car, and when the dealership wanted X amount of money more for a down payment, Vegas Friend, without hesitation, offered it to me. And I really didn’t want to take it, and it felt weird- but I was also so close to owning that car that I accepted. And of course, I paid him back.

( Side note, I did end up calling Mom/Ass Kicker at the dealership where she was like BUY THE DAMN CAR- in a nice way of course>)

Now I still didn’t have my license and Vegas Friend and I would practice in my car all the time… But I couldn’t bring myself to take the driver’s test. Then one-day Vegas Friend called me on my shit when I was in Texas. Basically, said I didn’t drive because I was too scared to drive, and I was just holding myself back. And he was stupidly correct. So, I made an appointment, took the test and PASSED! Still probably one of the greatest feelings I have had in my life.

Vegas Friend and I have been to Vegas twice, Palm Springs, we do fun random stuff all the time. He helped me move into where I am living now

Now I know what you’re thinking- wow, this “friend” is awfully nice. And yep, he is. But I think it’s obvious by our Vegas trips and sleep overs that we are a smidge more than friends. It’s complicated though- I won’t marry Vegas Friend. He won’t marry me. We won’t ever say I love you, or live together- and we are both 100% okay with that. We have a very low maintenance kind of “relationship” that works for both of us right now- and when it doesn’t work, then we will talk about it.

But this is what I will say… even though I am super hesitant to say these things on a blog…

The things I have learned from Vegas Friend are amazing. (So please Mom/Ass Kicker/ any one else who doesn’t want to know TURN AWAY)

I love traveling.

I love stuffed jalapenos.

There’s no way to see a movie unless it’s with reclining seats.

Sex is supposed to be good for BOTH people.

Star Wars doesn’t suck as much as I thought it would.

Relationships should be built on respect.

Back rubs solve almost everything.

People who respect you will never physically hurt you- in any capacity.

Beignets are a special type of delicious.

Day drinking is acceptable when you are on vacation.

Life is too short to eat crappy food.

What makes sex good is being comfortable and honest with each other.

 

Shit Vegas Friend does that makes me smile-

Ties my hair in a ponytail when I make cookies so it’s not in my face.

Cleans my car window when he fills my car up (because I don’t like to pump).

Makes sure the heater is on when I come over.

Teaches me to put air in my tires.

Spends money on a henna tattoo for me, knowing it will wash off.

Pretty sure he almost called 911 one day when I was writhing in pain from cramps at his house.

 

Like I said, it’s REALLY complicated. And I am leaving a few key pieces out here as to why it is so complicated.

But it works, and if for nothing else to teach us both some more lessons in life with a smile- and a lunch buddy.

GYST DAY

I’ve spoken before about GYST days and how I value them. Sundays are my coveted days for Gyst-ing I like to get as much done as possible so that I can try and relax during the week (or, if you’re keeping up with my life; in case I get a deadly head cold and sleep for 48 hours).

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A made bed is now a rule for me, because if I don’t make my bed I tend to crawl back into it for “just 5 more minutes”. Most Sundays I have to calculate my priorities, cleaning/ chores or homework. This Sunday I did my chores first because I was totally  putting off homework. #Whoops

I deeply needed to organize all of my files, bills, letters, divorce crap- so I got out my trusty label maker and labeled a file folder/pendaflex thing and got to work. I really didn’t like the idea of all my bills and important documents being in a million places, so organizing them like this was awesome! Now if I need anything I know exactly where it is, and it takes a second to grab. And of course in the event of a fire/ tsunami/ SoCal-Natural-Disaster we might have, I will be prepared! IMG_4915

Around 10 I practically forced myself to sit down and get some homework done. I wouldn’t say that my classes are hard (excluding one that I am in right now where i’m 98% sure my professor is trying to kill me). However, it takes such self discipline to sit down for hours and devote your time to homework. Nevertheless I do it- even if I seriously don’t want to.

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At some point in the day I dusted the house, did some laundry, cleaned my bathroom… and then the fun part of GYST day…

PEDICURE TIME! IMG_4989

Now of course this is not an every week thing for two reasons. 1- I hate people touching my feet and it took an unbelievable amount of will power not to kick this lady in the face. So ticklish it’s agony. (But I have cute toes now!) And 2- I am not rich by ANY means, and this is definitely an unnecessary expense.

All in all this was a pretty typical/ normal GYST day for me. Sometimes I do more, sometimes less- but the point of GYST-ing is to literally Get Your Shit Together. Homework and cleaning are always a priority, as is some sort of hair mask (I saved you guys from the picture, you are welcome), and on occasion I shave my legs.

Only occasionally- winter is coming. 🙂

#HandleIt

One of the most profound things I have learned in life is that you just have to to #handleit.

Is the sink over flowing with dishes and are you out of clean underwear? Handle it.

Homework due in 45 minutes, you just burnt your dinner and your hair has reached the limit of dry shampoo intake…. #handleit. impossoble things

There are so many things that I don’t want to do. For instance, I don’t want to call the lawyer about my divorce on my lunch break; but I have to. I don’t want to come home and do homework when I am dead-dog-exhausted; but I have to. I don’t want to look at my bank account, or set up an automatic savings plan, devote an entire day to laundry and meal prep; but I have to.

Being adult-ish means we have to do stuff we don’t like. We have to put our big girl (or boy, no judging) panties on and get shit done!

Because if not we would all be naked on the couch eating cheeto puffs and bon bons…

 

Let that sink in…

cheeto puff