Exhausted Because I Am Growing A Hippocampus

No but really it’s true. In my psych class right now we are studying all sorts of strange things. One project is a case report on a 7 year old girl. Now I suppose I could pick issues out left and right with the textbook by my side and I could diagnose this child with a million things. But one, morally that feels quite strange, and two… she’s 7.

So in reading pages upon pages and doing so much research I found that we have a hippocampus (okay, I already knew this exhisted, but bear with me). The hippocampus is largely in charge of aggression, emotion and memory. The hippocamps regulates emotion. So it’s kind of an important thing, right?

Well turns out it develops with you until you are about 285 when it is fully developed. So *basically* we have been making decisions with only have a brain for the first 25 years of our life. I feel like this explains so much.

All jokes aside, it was a interesting moment when I realized that we are still physically and emotionally developing. Maybe this gives excuse to our crisis break downs at 20 and how we can’t logically think through some tough areas in our life.

The hippocampus, though located in the limbic system therefore associated with emotions, memory and motivation is most highly involved with our memories.

Let’s do math. Memories + Under Developed Emotional Capabilities + Stress= 20 year old life crisis. This explains so much.

This explains how it is possible to be so emotionally exhausted. We are searching for answers our brains don’t even have yet. Working with undeveloped organs.

Even though we are adulting and kicking asses and taking names- we are still tired. It takes a lot of work to grow a hippocampus (I mean, probably. Not a scientist or anything). Just think about these things the next time you’re pissed because you don’t know why you feel a certain way or why you can’t emotionally work through something. And then blame your under developed hippocampus.

When You’re Raised In The South

I grew up in Texas and lived there in all the Southern Glory until I was 18. Then I moved to what is arguably the opposite side of the world, San Diego. Stan The Man, BK and I went on a cruise leaving from New Orleans, Louisiana and then stayed a few days once returned to explore good old NOLA.

It’s important to note that I have never considered my self a “southerner” and I’ll gladly take someone calling me a “valley girl” as a compliment. But I guess it’s true, you can’t take the south out of a southerner. And here’s why:

When you’re raised in the south

You say thank you, to everyone, all the time. It doesn’t matter if you hold the door open for me or if you scan my boarding ticket. THANK YOU.

When you’re raised in the south you greet everyone. In the elevator, the hall, on the bus- everyone gets a smile and a hello. It’s just the nice thing to do.

When you’re raised in the south you instinctively know (especially if you’re up against the Gulf of Mexico) that you need to pack shorts for the hot hours, a sweater for before the storm, umbrella for the storm the weather forecaster didn’t mention, and then a bathing suit for an hour later.

When you’re raised in the south you don’t straighten your hair. You scrunch it or put it in a pony tail because humidity is real. Or you pay lots of money for good anti-frizz products.

When you’re raised in the south rain is nothing special. And you’ve likely stood outside during the beginning stages of a hurricane as a child. It’s what you do.

And lastly, when you’re born in the south nothing scares you more than an old granny because you know she can go from sweet cookie maker to devil worshipper in 3 seconds flat.

How To Kick Anxieties Ass| Collab w/ Nicculent!

Hello lovelies, and welcome back to Adultish! Now as you know if you’ve been following my blog for any amount of time I am about as anxious as they come. I’m talking I can’t tie my shoes if I am hesitant about my breakfast choice kind of anxious. Anxiety is such a complex “thing” (let’s not call it a disorder just to be nice). Nicculent has done an amazing job at outlining what anxiety is, and how to tell if you have it. This is a collaboration we have worked hard on and to get the full effect make sure you check out her blog on this as well! In this blog we will talk about ways to manage your anxiety… and let me tell you, I have definitely found some tricks along the way!

Firstly, I think it’s really important to come to terms with the idea that you are anxious. I don’t believe in hiding your feelings and hoping they will go away. That’s the equivalent of putting a blanket over a pile of laundry and pretending it’s folded- while we have all been guilty, we are just lying to ourselves.

Now that you know you’re an anxious little bundle of emotions, try to rationally think about what it is that’s making you anxious. Take your anxiety as an opportunity to reevaluate your current situation and ask yourself what could be done to resolve the problem. This takes a tremendous effort to step outside of the “feelings” box you are in and enter a happier place.

This happy place can be whatever you want it to be. Think beach, forest, at home with your partner, with your parents, or alone in a bath tub with a bottle of wine (guilty). When you become anxious think about this happy place, it will lower your heart rate and allow your thoughts to swim a bit slower so you can actually *think* about what is going on.

While you are rationally thinking about your life and visualizing yourself in a tub as big as the Ganges river, your thoughts can either be happy or good. Usually when we are anxious we are also mean to ourselves. Thoughts like “why didn’t I do this, ugh so stupid!” swim around and that hammers us into an even more anxious little ball of emotion. Instead of letting your “mean voice” control the scene, allow the positive voice to come into play. Think “I know this didn’t go as planned, but what can I do now.”. When we think negatively we charge the vicious cycle of anxiety. When we think positively, we calm the cycle, we ground ourselves and become more realistic in our thinking.

Now of course not everything is that easy, and it takes a very strong mind and heart to implement these steps as they are mentally challenging. But what you already know about anxiety is that certain things will serve as triggers to your anxiety. For me, I am most anxious when my apartment isn’t clean, or when I don’t get enough sleep. Situations out of my control that make me anxious is when I think someone is mad at me. These things I might not have complete control over and to think my apartment can be immaculate at all times is just a psychotic thought I have given up on. So instead, I learned to change my approach. If I think someone is mad at me, I rationally think if I have upset them, and even if I have, I tell myself I can not allow it to steal my joy.

It’s not like everytime you are experiencing severe anxiety that you have to play along with these mind game mentioned above. Sometimes you need a quicker, more realistic “fix’. This is when I recommend the following:

  • Talk to a friend, let them in, and maybe cry a little. It’s good for your soul and you will feel lighter- I pinky promise.
  • Go for a walk outside. Sunshine helps with your mood so much, and getting your body moving will make your mind stop.
  • EAT. Make sure you eat something throughout the day. I have noticed if I accidentally skimp on meals that my anxiety is 10x worse. I think it is the sugar crash.
  • Write it out. Take all of your anxious little feelings and thoughts and give them another home other than your mind. As the words form on your paper let them stay there, and do not give them permission to come back into your thoughts.
  • Talk to a doctor. When my anxiety and depression was at its worse I went to the doctor and was prescribed medicine that helped me SO much. I was still able to function, and it gave me the ability to live my life. When I got off the medicine I was left with a better understanding of which situations should instill anxiety and which one’s my brain was taking too far.

I hope this blog was helpful to someone! These were my tricks along the way to becoming a less anxious person, and how I think I was able to really overcome being diagnosed with anxiety. I hope you check out Nicculents blog as well and show her some love!

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Give Me All The Coffee

Welcome back! Now, let’s get into the nitty gritty. I think I may be overdoing it this week, not going to lie. Here’s a break down of my week–

Monday- Work event- at work from 7am- 7:30pm.

Tuesday- At work at 6:30, proctor, 3 meetings and a crap ton of homework. Oh, and I need to make a diaper cake for Wednesday, work project #1 due.

Wednesday- Baby shower I planned for two people. Food, decorations, 4 hours of set up and countless email. Homework due. You need to grocery shop.

Thursday- proctor, work on collab blog, clean up Stan The Mans house for his pending arrival, big work project #2 due, set up for another work event.

Friday- Work event, homework due, collab blog due, work project #3 due, death.

I just want to know why I said “yes” to the diaper cake. I’ve gotta learn to say no! But let’s be real; the diaper cake isn’t stressing me out, it’s just the work load right now.

In other fascinating news, ToBeAdultish now has a Facebook page! And a Twitter! And needs a nap!!

All of the work stress and starting a new class on Monday has affected my sleep- I am dreaming I am at work and alligators are coming to class. What?!

I found gluten free donuts and they taste just like I would imagine fairy dust to taste like, only with the slightest hint of cardboard.

I have shaved my legs everyday this week, and yet missed a spot every single time. How does this happen?

It was 113 degrees the other day and I melted.

That’s your beautifully summarized coffee talk this week my lovely friends. Stay tuned for something super great to happen on Friday!!

Vegas Friends Name, My New Diet and Life Crisis.

Hello you fancy people, you. Welcome back to another Coffee Catch up, by yours truly. If you are new to the blog feel free to catch up, no pun intended, with my lasttwo Coffee Catch Up blogs or you might be confused! These Coffee Catch Ups are a time where I get to just word vomit all over and explain what I have been doing and share any new life developments/ midlife (24-year-old) life crisis.

In my last Coffee Catch Up I was on quite the high from seeing CELINE DION, and yes, every time I type her name it will be in caps lock. If she doesn’t deserve caps, then who does? It’s been exactly a month since I saw CELINE DION and I don’t think a day has gone by that I haven’t immersed myself in her songs. Because I am obsessed. And the first step to overcoming a problem, if that’s what we are calling it, is to admit you have a problem.

In new developments, we have a big one! I have officially become Gluten Free, and not really of my liking. I miss cookies so much it hurts. Long story short I have had a lot of issues with my diet, in particular bloating. Now this isn’t like “you ate too much salt” kind of bloating. No. This is “Oh my god how did you go to lunch and come back 6 months pregnant?!” bloating. So I started to really watch what I ate and realized if I ate fruits, veggies and meat that I felt totally fine after a meal! But the moment I tried to have pizza, a burger, even a piece of cake I would get so bloated. As slightly bummed as I am to know that, on some level I probably have a gluten intolerance, I have to admit it’s nice to be able and eat and not feel sick. I have yet to really research any good gluten free recipes and I am living on recommendations and a meat, cheese, veggie and fruit diet right now because it’s quick and easy. So if you have any recipes or tips and tricks you could offer up, please let me know. I am kind of constantly hungry right now.

Vegas Friend is once again out of town. In a recent conversation between the two of us I decided to no longer call him Vegas Friend… In real life I rarely even call him by his real name. So I thinking I will start to refer to him as Stan The Man. And plus, “Vegas Friend” IS THE MAN. Like holy crap. He’s awesome. He makes me laugh, cheers me up, teaches me somewhat valuable life lessons like putting air in my tires and accompanies me on 97% of the meals I eat. As far as I am concerned he is pretty legit, and deserves a name more than just “Vegas Friend” because truthfully, I am at his house every weekend. I go over there after work, we usually have lunch together, I help with Bonus Kid and we do more than just go to Vegas Together.

Lastly, a school update. I am two days away from finishing off a class, hopefully with an A. I am proud that I was able to keep up with Adultish, school, and not become a COMPLETE wreck. Though there were days it was a little hit or miss.

As always, thank you guys so much for stopping by! I hope you enjoy these little blogs where I catch you up on my craziness.

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Meet Me In The Middle| Adultish

Every night I meet the stars at 1am and I start the dance I know too well.

Tossing with sheets and trips to the bathroom, making a to do list and checking notifications.

Every night is the same and my mind spills out a thousand words in the notes section of my phone, never to be seen.

I douse myself in lavender, cling to my crystals and turn on soothing music but my mind continues to race of that one email I didn’t reply to and thoughts of impending doom if I somehow fall asleep again and find myself late to work, only compounding my list and ensuring I forget another email.

Mental questions of what I am doing and how I am doing it.

Maybe I am too rough with myself, striving for all that can be done and yet still not satisfied.

So I Pinterest moon quotes, maybe I will find solace in the spoken words of other insomniacs.

Maybe I have lost me in all the searching I have done to be whole.

What if me is not whole at all but rather fragments of people I was in the past.

I am a twinge of divorced, a sprinkle of 24 and barely making it, a dash of ass kicker/moms hopes of my life and a whirlwind of questions from BK such as “what is a douchebag”.

My phone is filled with unanswered texts.

Not because I don’t care, but because I am lost as to a reply.

I don’t know what to do about your relationship and I can’t tell you ten more times to leave.

I don’t know if I want to go to church with you because I never sleep I have hopes one day I will, and that’ll likely be on a Sunday.

So instead, meet me where I am, at 3 am with a cup of coffee in my blog comments or at my door.

Bring coffee to me at work and understand when I cant “stay a while”.

Realize I have 7 hours of homework and a ten page paper due and meet me in grace when I feel unsure if I am really smart enough.

Know if I don’t respond it’s not out of malice, but the more likely scenario that I forgot or just don’t know what to say.

Understand our life paths are completely different and I am not being rude, rather practical.

Don’t blame my unavailability on what you think is depression or anxiety because I am doing quite well right now, thank you.

Ask if I have eaten and bring be food anyway because I am likely lying and too busy to stop.

Hug me when you see me and hold me tight and maybe I will take a break.

Bring chocolate with bad news and bring a smile if you need a favor.

Bring your whole self and I’ll bring mine and we can meet somewhere in the middle of expectation and reality.

I Blogged 31 Days Straight| Adultish

Well, Fam. We made it. 31 blogs all in May Blog A Day and I’m pretty impressed with myself for writing them, and all of your loving support! We hit some great milestones this month with Adultish, more featured blogs, reblogs, over 1,000 likes AND Adultish grew by 60 amazing people!

I am floored by the constant support and love you all pour in to my blog, and how some of you guys have even followed me along the way to my vacation and given Vegas Friend and I ideas of things to do.

Now I am not going to lie, this was a little hard to do at times. Having a blog post go up every single morning without fail while juggling work, being in Cancun, on vacation- I learned a LOT!

I was really able to truly work on Adultish for a month straight.

I was able to see how much Vegas Friend supports Adultish by his patience to go to the one restaurant with service to publish blogs and respond to comments.

I learned my blog would only be half as cool if it weren’t for Vegas Friend and all the pictures he took.

But mostly I learned a lot about you guys! Having everyday interactions with you all introduced me to some amazing people.

:Nicculent: Brutal Honesty. Lots of it. You guys should already know I am in love with this blog based on the name alone. I love her writing style and, well, homegirls honest AF! It’s so refreshing to read something you can relate to on such a personal, and humorous level.

Cherishing Flo– So I feel like if Adultish had a younger sister, it would be this blog. She’s real, funny, sweet, totally relatable. Yeah. Adultish’s younger sis for sure.

Damn Girl, or DYGYST. Okay, if you don’t know about Damn Girl, then DAMN GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING. She’s basically blog witchcraft. She grew her blog so stinking quick, she’s hysterical, we have a somewhat similar shitty upbringing (I actually think she wins the race there) and her advise is spot on.

You guys know I am all about paying it forward to the bloggers that have inspired and supported me. But I also want to remain that platform for funny, uplifting, motivating and relatable blogs- and I think you will find that in these blogs as well.

Happy blog binging!